There's rarely a "right" thing to say after a loss, and that uncertainty is often what keeps people from reaching out at all. Sendly writes a gentle, sincere condolence message — simple, sincere, and without the clichés that can feel hollow during grief. The goal isn't to find perfect words, just honest ones.
Real examples, grouped by who you're writing to. Click one to open it in the composer and make it yours.
I don't have the right words, but I'm here — for anything you need, any hour. I love you and I'm so sorry.
Use this one →There's nothing I can say to make this easier, so I'll just say: I'm here, and I love you.
Use this one →So sorry, my friend. I'm thinking of you constantly and I'm just a call away, whenever you need.
Use this one →I'm so sorry for your loss. Whatever you need — space, company, someone to sit with you — I'm here.
Use this one →My heart is with you right now. I'm so sorry, and I'm not going anywhere.
Use this one →I'm so sorry. We're all thinking of you and holding you close through this.
Use this one →There are no words big enough for this loss. I love you and I'm here for whatever you need.
Use this one →So sorry for your loss. The family is here for you, today and in all the days after.
Use this one →I'm thinking of you and holding onto the good memories alongside you. I'm so sorry.
Use this one →My deepest sympathy. Please lean on us — that's exactly what family is for right now.
Use this one →I'm so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you during this difficult time.
Use this one →My deepest condolences. Please take all the time you need — we're thinking of you.
Use this one →So sorry to hear this. Sending you strength and sympathy during such a hard time.
Use this one →I'm thinking of you and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Use this one →My sincere condolences. Please know we're here if you need anything at all.
Use this one →I don't have the right words, but I'm thinking of you and I'm here.
Use this one →There's nothing I can say that feels like enough, so I'll just say I'm so sorry, and I'm here.
Use this one →I've started this message a few times and nothing feels right — just know I'm thinking of you.
Use this one →I don't know what to say, only that I'm so sorry and I'm holding you in my thoughts.
Use this one →Words feel small right now, but I wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and I care.
Use this one →I'm so sorry — the loss of a pet is a real loss, and I hope you're giving yourself room to grieve it fully.
Use this one →So sorry about your loss. They were so loved, and that kind of love doesn't just disappear.
Use this one →I'm thinking of you. Losing a pet is losing a family member, and I'm so sorry you're going through it.
Use this one →So sorry for your loss. The house is quieter in a way that's hard to explain to anyone who hasn't been through it.
Use this one →I'm so sorry. Whatever your years together looked like, they mattered, and so does this grief.
Use this one →Keep it simple and direct — "I'm so sorry for your loss, I'm thinking of you" is enough, and reaching for more elaborate language often does less than a plain, sincere sentence. What matters most is that you reached out at all.
Usually yes, and it's often more comforting than avoiding it — grieving people frequently notice when others tiptoe around saying the name, and using it can feel like an acknowledgment rather than something painful. If you're close to the family, this is almost always the better choice.
Avoid phrases that try to explain or rationalize the loss, like "they're in a better place" or "everything happens for a reason," unless you know for certain it matches the grieving person's beliefs. Even well-intended, these can land as dismissive of what they're actually feeling.
"I don't have the right words, but I'm thinking of you and I'm here." Admitting you don't know what to say is itself a sincere and completely acceptable message — it's more honest than reaching for language that isn't really yours.